Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Randomize
