Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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