She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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