so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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