your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i love accidental penises.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
