Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
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