Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(562): View more from California

Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.

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(231): View more from Michigan

i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.

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(206): View more from Washington

He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...

(1-206): View more from Washington

He obviously understands you completely.

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(931): View more from Tennessee

is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(574): View more from Indiana

I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor

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(901): View more from Tennessee

Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.

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(636): View more from Missouri

Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.

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(406): View more from Montana

We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever

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