I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You can't just leave with hair like that
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
