I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Randomize
