U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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