In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
