Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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