U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He? As in you personified your dick?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize