And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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