am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
