real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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