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• (631): View more from New York

  fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?

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• (516): View more from New York

  OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM

  Fav 34 8299 2149

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• (562): View more from California

  it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (631): View more from New York

  She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar

  (219): View more from Indiana

  I need you to use more vowels.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.

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• (315): View more from New York

  Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.

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• (845): View more from New York

  The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend

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