at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
