i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
