i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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