I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Randomize
