; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
