My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
