you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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