I could have mohawked her pubes.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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