gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
