well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
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Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels