Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
