I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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