and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
