My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
