For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
