i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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