I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
