can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
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