Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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