I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize