I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
