Pappa wants mamma naked
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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