He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
