Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
