just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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