his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
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She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
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Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
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