i wish my penis had a tongue
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Please don't give away my fajitas
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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