let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You're like the curious george of whores
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
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