Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I got chris browned last night
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize