Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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