too bad you live with your parents still
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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