The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
