Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
