you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
