You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I have tasted many bathrooms
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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