Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
hell yes lets make some ravioli
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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